Step Right Up

Step Right Up

I worked this morning on very detailed stuff that was tedious but had to get done. Then I took a break to get on the bike and ride for a bit to loosen up and grab a bite at a new place that opened up a few miles away from us.  It was a cool ride , just barely in the 60’s but the sun was warm and it felt very refreshing to be moving…….sitting and staring at computers for hours makes me “creaky”.

We’ve been watching the transformation of a particular open space into a “Fine Eatery” for months. I was really looking forward to trying them out as I had skipped breakfast and was hungry after working and my ride. The place had a few other diners in it but the line at the counter went a bit wonky as we all figured which line we were supposed to be in to place our eat in orders. Halfway through the line of “order-ers” the Cash Register went on the fritz and the whole operation came to a standstill. The worker bees caucused to determine “WHAT TO DO ??” Then a guy with an authoritative air rushed in from the back to take charge and commanded “take down credit card numbers on paper !!!...........”What if they want to pay with cash ?"  one of the privates asked ……….”Humm, ??? OK, we can take cash”, he said. Obviously a guys who could Step Right Up under pressure.

As I made my way forward in the queue, I observed that the poor soldiers behind the counter were totally dis-combulated – Inching ever forward it became pretty clear that even though these front line folks were in a tizzy, the Kitchen was even worse.  I could leave now ……or not ?

I chose to be part of the science experiment playing out in front of me and stepped right up and placed my order. The FOUR ladies behind the counter were frazzled……….”Our Cash Register is Down” they bleated out to everyone in front of them, even though all of us in the line have heard the cries of doom with each preceding order they took.  It was a pitiful site, worthy of  Sally Struther’s voice-overs with each succeeding “guest”. After placing my order for the “Turkey Sandwich Special” they asked if it would be OK if I paid when the sandwich was delivered because “your cash register is down” I answered for them. They looked at each other like I was Karnak the Magnificent………”how’d HE know that ??”

So, for TWENTY minutes, I sat and watched the experiment continue until I finally asked about my order…..”Oh, would you mind giving it to us again ??..........Our Cash…”………”Register is down” I finished for them. (Again, same look of wonderment……….”how’d HE know ???”)

Finally I got my “Turkey Sandwich” and paid with Cash $8.93……….I gave then $9 and I THEN could not believe it………..Out pops THE CALCULATOR !!!....................”keep the change” , I mumbled as I walked back to my counter spot…………..oh, brother!

In my absence some young gents had decided it was now their counter and settled in. I just stood there and vibed them. It took about 15 seconds but they looked up and said “oh, was this your spot ?””, I just “gryelled” at them (growl-smile) and nodded. As they slid over I set my “special sandwich” down and open the box. JUST a sandwich wrapped in paper cut in half……nothing else, Ugh. At this point I was grouchy and hungry and took a huge bite. Chew, chew, chew, crunch, more crunch………..CRAP !!!..... ....BACON !!!  I have not eaten red meat in over 20 years !!!.....ERRRRrrrrrrr !!......That’s gonna be a problem.   As I did a Pick, pick, pick through the sandwich I reviewed the dozens of clues I chose to overlook to subject myself to this disappointment. Dozens. Then of course I did the full life review of other times I’ve made the choice to not heed the rather sophisticated (if I may say so myself) internal warning system I have in place for just such potential catastrophes.  As I pondered the review I picked through the other half of the sandwich to remove the swine and promised myself………..”Next time”. “Yep, next time for sure”.