Breakin Free

Breakin’ Free

I awoke disoriented from my dreams and looked around to see that I was safe and sound. “It was only a dream”, I reminded myself as I untied myself from the Gordian knot of sheets and blankets I worked myself into during the night. As I stood up and grabbed my water glass I turned back to the bed and was reminded of the “doozie” of an experience I encountered during the previous few short hours.

Edy is still in Taos with the gang while I work to coax green shoots of local business from the griddle hot pavement. I miss her terribly and busy myself pretty well during the day. Evenings are generally OK if I have a few books going but I missed the library on Friday and have been book-less for the past few days. TV is my only salvation for escape. I am always amazed how I can never find a thing to watch out of the ga-zillion channels available. I’ll “surf”  a bit then multi-task via Ipad to Google something that needs further investigation and that is always fun for  a bit too. Eventually though I look left and see her pile of pillows, just sigh and feel the void; Ugh !

My dreams last night centered around having a few dozen projects all going at the same time and in different parts of the world with the various hoops that one must jump through for the various personalities, politics and code enforcement officials that each area and project brings with it. This one also included Financial Folks for the various projects and all of their shenanigans in posturing and power trips they like to thrust on anyone in their sphere(s). Then added to this whole mess was the awareness part way through that somehow I had obtained partners and these partners had brought with them their own teams and staff. They are all talking to me like I know them and that all of these projects I had landed and currently managed were now theirs. They were saying things like “My” this and “Mine” ……..in every discussion with the Owners, Bankers, Lawyers, Politicos etc….Each time I asked them individually and collectively “Who are you “? The more I asked the more they would fake smile and do the “Mine, Mine, Mine”, thing to someone else….It was a freak show and I did not know how to stop it. So, at one point I just pulled my chair back from the monster boardroom table ( I had designed a decade previous) and just “observed” ………While the din of the Corporate nonsense was blabbering forth I began a dream within a dream of an old boat I used to have off the Mystic River in CT.

“Breakin-Free”.

I traded work for her from a Dr. buddy of mine who bought her after his divorce. She was only 24ft, and kind of old but had good bones and new sails.  I enjoyed the heck out of her for years. It’s super bad luck to change the name of a boat without “proper ceremony” so not being that confident with my position with Poseidon and his realm, I kept the name to ensure the safety of me, my passengers and crew. I ended also trading her muich later for work from a contractor buddy of mine so I could also break free of some stuff…………..thus continuing the good luck and going full circle.

I re-entered the Corporate Dream with the folks around the table looking at me asking when the Certificates of Occupancy would be issued on X,Y,Z ??? while others were wondering why the Cork from Portugal was late??? (again) and why our land holdings in Mexico were now nationalized ?.................:”Good questions” I said as I got up and left the room….”Very Good Questions” I again said to myself as I kept on walking.  I could see them all looking and mumbling at me through the windows of a Conference Space I knew quite well. As I walked out I could see that the cleaning people still did a disgraceful job at that place……

……fade to light…………and start making coffee.

I walked over to church this AM and the guest Pastor was a funny eloquent black man cut from the cloth of other strong southern preachers before him. He had 40,000 folks laughing, crying, singing and basically jubulating their collective hearts out. It was a blast and I came home un-slimed from my nights excursion and in a very happy place.

As I was walking in the Garage I passed a couple who looked like they just came out of a Red Square USSR Propaganda Poster. As we came closer the guy turned away and sneezed, BUT he sneezed WITH an accent !! No kidding ! It made a great day even better and I gave them both a nod and a  “Do svidaniya” as we passed. As I got to the elevator I started thinking about James Bond and Blind Drops and all the associated Spy Stuff that comes from passing Russians in a garage ………….(Is it just me ?)

Anyway, last week was one heck of a ride. A huge build up and then over the edge freefalling to the next……….and now I’m just sitting in the pool waiting to get filled up enough to flow over the edge again for the free fall to the next-next………then the next….Breakin Free, an atom at a time.